Awareness is a hot topic these days. It’s a comfortable word—safe, surface-level, and easy to rally around. While awareness plays a crucial role in educating people about autism, it’s just the first step in a longer journey. That’s where acceptance comes in.
Autism acceptance asks us to go beyond understanding and actually show up: to shift our perspectives and fully embrace autistic people for who they are. “It’s about letting go of the idea that there’s only one ‘right’ way to think, feel, or communicate,” says Lola, a Fello, mom, and educator with over 20 years of experience supporting children with autism, including her son.
For Lola, the shift began in the classroom as a special ed teacher. “I learned the signs of autism, the labels, and the educational strategies. But all of that changed when it became personal—when my own son was diagnosed with PDD-NOS. I no longer saw autism through the lens of theory, I saw it through the eyes of my son. Acceptance came when I stopped relying on textbooks and started listening to him to truly understand his world, his needs, and his gifts.”
Lola's son’s diagnosis was her turning point, but you don’t need a personal connection to start embracing autism. We asked her to share the steps that have had the biggest impact in building real, everyday acceptance—simple things she’s seen work firsthand.
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How to move from awareness to acceptance
Use respectful language:
High-functioning vs. low-functioning, autistic person vs. person with autism—there are a lot of terms we might use without realizing how much they matter.
“Looking back, I wish we had used language that focused more on strengths, needs, and individuality instead of boxing kids in,” Lola says. “I’ve learned how powerful words are, and now I try to use language that uplifts, respects, and truly sees the whole person.”
Labels like high- or low-functioning can set the wrong expectations, even for the individual themselves. It’s more helpful to be specific—do they need more support, are they non-speaking, do they use a device? That kind of clarity goes further. The same goes for identity—whether it’s “autistic person” or “person with autism,” it’s often a personal preference. If you’re unsure, Lola suggests simply asking: “It’s a small thing that shows you care.”
Listen more than you talk
You don’t have to know everything or say it perfectly—sometimes, the best way to embrace autism is by listening and simply making space for someone to show up as themselves.
“There’s still a lot of room for growth in listening to autistic voices and letting them lead the way when it comes to how they want to be talked about and supported,” says Lola.
Don’t force them into a mold—just love them
“In the beginning, I thought I had to have all the answers,” Lola says. “But now, I understand it’s more about being present, listening, and creating a space where he feels safe and accepted just as he is.”
Make room for autistic people to show up as they are—without judgment or the pressure to fit into societal expectations. The more we listen instead of lead, the more accepting and inclusive the world becomes.
Acceptance isn’t about having all the answers—it’s about being open, kind, and willing to learn. As Lola’s story reminds us, real change starts with small, intentional choices: the words we use, the way we listen, and the space we create for others to fully be themselves. Because at the end of the day, autism acceptance isn’t just for April—it’s something we can practice and live out every day.
